Monday, 14 April 2014

Tattoos, gigs and a lesson in becoming "socially appropriate"

Greetings! And a very merry Monday to each and every one of you!

It's been a while since our last blog post so bear with us whilst we try to sum up the last few exciting weeks succinctly!

Well... Hawkeye has a new tattoo... OF A HAWK! And Windy recently watched a film called "The Box" which was only around 40% as interesting as the title would have you believe.

Now you're up to date, let us tell you about some of our upcoming gigs! One of them has requested that we do material that is "appropriate for a family audience". This has thrown us somewhat as most of our material is not appropriate even for an audience full of consenting adults. In an attempt to find out how to be "appropriate", we consulted the internet vault of all that is wise and true; the online oracle "ehow". 

Here we found sage advice on how to become appropriate in 5 easy steps. We have copied and pasted steps 1 and 5 for your information and have underlined the important parts:

1. Be a diplomat. Little white lies and "deceptions" are the glue that hold a large part of society together. Feigning interest, keeping your true thoughts private, being diplomatic -- sometimes sugar-coating the truth -- are valuable social skills.

5. Conform to the social climate. A hallmark of a socially adept, socially skilled individual is the ability to adjust her social behavior to fit the tone, or climate, of a particular situation.

So there you have it, readers! We are going to become conformist liars (sorry, diplomats) in order to be accepted into the elite circles of the 'socially appropriate'. 

Failing that, we'll make some children cry and get chased off of the stage by pitchfork-wielding, socially-appropriate adults. Either way it'll be entertaining, so come on down! 

In other news, we have written a new song that we will be premiering at a gig this Thursday. It is definitely NOT about the Daily Mail newspaper. It is also not appropriate in any sense of the word. 

For details of our upcoming gigs, have a look here! In the next couple of months we'll be performing in Ashton, Manchester, Preston, Liverpool, Blackpool and more, so there's no excuse! Come! It'll be a hoot!

Thanks for reading, look out for our next blog post which may contain VERY exciting information! (Unfortunately the exciting news is not yet officially confirmed which is why it's not included today... Intrigued? You should be!)

LOL (lots of love)

Hawkeye and Windy

P.S. In case you missed this internet gem, here's a song we only wish we could have written. Powerful, emotional and not at all cringeworthy, vomit-inducing AWFULNESS... LET'S GET SOCIAL! 

Saturday, 11 January 2014

The Third Time's a Charm

This week we performed at our third gong show to date at Beat the Frog at The Frog and Bucket in Preston. You know what they say, the third time's a charm, and we are very proud to say that we won! This was a big deal for us. Hooray!

The audience were absolutely amazing and we were up against some tough competition from the other performers. Here is the official winner's photograph complete with lighting-induced Hitler moustaches and MC for the night, Dan Nightingale.

Next up - Heat Two of the Musical Comedy Awards in London next Saturday 18th January - which for some strange reason, is ridiculously popular. See you next week!

Sunday, 5 January 2014

Happy Birthday to Us!


Well hasn't 2013 just flown by. As of 1st January 2014, we are celebrating exactly ONE YEAR of the Hawkeye and Windy experience! And you should be too.

During 2013, we turned 14 gigs old.

Special 2013 highlights include:



Manchester's Women in Comedy Festival:

And a special song we wrote for our friend Tony and his charity event: 
(which was essentially about poo-poo)

We guarantee that 2014 will be even better!

We're through to WeGotTicket's Musical Comedy Awards (we're actually weeing our pants with excitement right now) and we have lots more Public Safety Announcements in the pipeline.

Stay tuned, stay safe, and join us for THE 2014 HAWKEYE AND WINDY EXPERIENCE!

Wednesday, 9 October 2013

Wednesday Weekend Round-Up

This weekend we performed at the Women in Comedy Festival UK! Exclusive interview by Craig and Joe here!

We also beat the 'King Gong at The Comedy Store Manchester on our FIRST EVER ATTEMPT. Picture here!

Although we didn't win, we believe we came second according to the clapometer. Good times! And congratulations to MC Africa Zulu for being crowned the Gong King! We can't find anything on the internet about him.

It has been a thrilling weekend. Don't forget we're playing at Embryo Studio Salford (Kings Arms, Salford) on 25th October. You might get to interview us if you ask nicely.

More breaking news! This weekend we were featured on The British Comedy Guide - a most prestigious website for the most prestigious comedy! Link here!

Out and over!
Hawkeye and Windy

Saturday, 5 October 2013

A Fun Day Out at The Pub


It's been a while! But fear not, we bring you tidings of a new video release! Believe it or not, this was all filmed in ONE DAY. With the very large amount of special guests to organise, this was quite a feat! We'd like to thank all of our very special guests from the bottom of our wine glass and especially the nice lady who gifted Windy with a parking permit. We saved a grand sum of £2 which is going towards our next video budget.

Please note the head chef banging his wok amongst the glorious bar staff during the last chorus. HOWEVER, there is a man carelessly walking through this oh-so-climactic shot. This is NOT good. We waited TWO HOURS for all of the alcoholic customers (including a wedding party) to clear out so we could get this shot. We will hunt this man down and, well, we haven't decided what to do with him yet but YOU SHOULD BEWARE you shot-ruining-pub-goer.

As always, enjoy responsibly!

Hawkeye and Windy

Tuesday, 13 August 2013

Meet Gary, Our Most Obsessive Fan

Gary had the fortune of running into us after our gig at The NewTown Bar, Edinburgh last weekend. He needs more tablets.

Monday, 12 August 2013

Video Review Ahoy!

After our gig at The NewTown Bar, Dublin Street, Edinburgh last night, Eilish O'Carroll - star of BBC's Mrs Brown's Boys and currently performing at The Fringe in her own show, 'Live Love Laugh', stopped by to say a few words about us. How lovely is she!?